Posted on 05/19/2025 8:57:52 AM PDT by RoosterRedux
Leading theologians have uncovered new evidence that when Noah's ark hit Mount Ararat, his wife was likely steering.
Naamah, daughter of Lamech, is traditionally considered to be Noah's wife, and all historical evidence seems to indicate that she was to blame for the famed vessel violently crashing into the tip of a mountain.
"After studying several extra-biblical ancient texts and consulting Jewish historians, it now seems Noah's stop on the top of Mount Ararat was completely unplanned, and totally his wife's fault," said biblical scholar Dr. Benjamin Abelman. "Every ancient source we currently possess now points to this as being the case."
"Also, she was a woman, so, you know, what more evidence do you need?"
Several newly uncovered sources say Noah's wife had offered to steer the ark for a while so Noah could catch some sleep, but she soon got distracted with her makeup...
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
Just don’t ask her to parallel park!
She probably did it while texting on her phone and yelling at the animals to sit down and put on their seat belts. It's tough driving while being the world's soccer mom.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wives_aboard_Noah%27s_Ark
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there was more than one wife, are we sure which one it is?
Was his wife a woman?
She was probably running up the gang plank when Noah slammed the door in her face.
This is true. She cant drive.
She forwarded the gene for a non-driving future to her descendance.
Define woman
Well, it deserves a LOL!
His sons also had one wife each.
Oof!
I don’t blame the wife. Rumor has it that Noah wasn’t napping, he was drunk...again.
What’s HER excuse?
Lol Yep, the captain of the ship was drunk so she stepped in and saved the day.
OMG....LOL...
Noah needed some rest, mostly because his wife spent over five months demanding why he wouldn't stop and ask for directions. The premise of "Captain Ron" doesn't look so dumb now, does it? :^)
In all seriousness, there were DNA studies done like this one years ago that suggest everyone's most recent common female ancestor (chromosomal Eve) is further back in the past that everyone's most recent common male ancestor (chromosomal Adam).
This backs up the Noah flood story, simply by looking at who was on the ark. The men were all blood related (Noah and his sons), so Noah is everyone's ancestor. But was Noah's wife everyone's ancestor (ignoring my earlier post for humor)? If everyone is a descendent of one of Noah's sons, then the sons' wives are our mama's and they probably weren't related. Thus, everyone's most common female ancestor wasn't Noah's wife, whoever our common female ancestor was lived before the flood. Perhaps Eve was the most recent (and only) common female ancestor. But to find our most common male ancestor (chromosomal Adam) you don't have to go all the way back to Adam, he's Noah. And the DNA studies seem to indicate that.
I knew it lol
And the Jackass was navigating?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzm1aJqkq-w
Two by Two: You Have Got to Have a Rudder on the Ark · Danny Kaye · Harry Goz · Michael Karm · Walter Willison
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